Its been a while. I have been getting requests for a new post. I'll admit, it takes a lot out of me to get going on a blog post..but what I forget to realize is that once you get going with writing, it all flows.
I see writing like giving. It takes time,some hesitation, and trust when you want to give. Even when the writing is technical or objective; You are giving a part of yourself; your mind and thoughts. Its a little something I read about in a book called Bird by Bird by Anne Lammott
I promised a post about the happenings of the past year for the 20 somethings. Since then, I updated a brief description about the goals of this blog on my 20SB page. You can also read the archives to find out what all that was like.
Life in Kansas City as a new Kitty owner, apartment renter, adventure seeker, and as usual, procrastinator, has been fruitful. The romance of the snow falling, coffee brewing and candle burning got me in that craved seasonal mood this morning. Today was one of those days I felt in love... with myself.
Time seems to pass so fast that its so hard to stop for just a second and take in the good in life. I had a conversation with a good friend about optimism vs. pessimism. More often than not pessimists will tell you that you are delusional in your optimism. They are the realists and we are just annoying.
No one ever denied that life is hard. Yes, we can all agree that even when life does get us down, there is no use in complaining about it and getting depressed. (although I must admit, a small sick part of me sometimes takes pleasure in complaining about the changes,adaptations and sacrifices I have had to make over the past year, and how many hurdles I have had to jump. ) Indeed, its all part of the learning process. See? I just go back right to seeing the good in it all.
Some people love drama. They love to sit and dwell over all the shit they have been through. They thrive on over dramatic displays of emotion. This is often emotionally draining for the people that have to listen to you! Take note that it is important and considerate to think of those around you. We have lives that are happening RIGHT NOW. If we continue to live in our past, will we ever get to our future? Tomorrow is gone forever. The best you can do is live the now and if what you are doing right now is going to lead you to a better tomorrow- then good for you. If not- please reconsider evaluating your goals in life, cuz I don't want to have to hear about every single move you made during the tumultuous time in your life. If you can offer me some sort of lesson, reflection, or bottom line- I would be glad to listen . Otherwise- shut up and move on.
On the flip, I also think there should be more room in life for compassion and affection.
Last week, I shocked myself by a simple act of kindness. For any of you who live in KC, you all know about Jerry on the Plaza. He is a panhandler who sits on busy street corners and yells " Im tryna raise a down payment on a cheeseburger" - while holding out a paper cup in your face as you pass by. Tourists love this because they think its a funny line. For those of us who have been here long enough, we all know that Jerry is not homeless. As a matter of fact, he has a nice house. He often frequents my favorite coffee shop and talks really loudly about how much he has made so far that day etc. I have seen him conversing with my barista friends and have seen a human side to him that I never expected to come out in the past 4 years. I pass by him with out ever giving him a cent. ( At times he is rude and need I say-- annoying? ) I was driving and as I hit the stop light, there was Jerry on the corner sitting on his crate. I wasn't even thinking when I found myself opening my window making chat with Jerry. He recognized me from the coffee shop and I corrected him on my name. I told him I didn't have much. He said anything would do. Searching for change in my car- I couldn't find anything in time to catch the light. Soon after my attempt, He grabbed my hand and kissed it "God Bless" . I drove away in complete awe as to what the hell had gotten into me. I mean- I really despise that guy! Maybe I was craving human contact, maybe I wanted him to know that I knew his name. Maybe I was just in a good mood and felt like being friendly. I don't know what it was, but all I know is that I drove away with a weird smile on my face. I guess its a sense of community that was created at that moment. I still do believe he is a little mentally ill... Yes, that must have been it. Sympathy.
Next time you see Jerry out on the corner, try talking to him and listen to all the crazy that comes out of his mouth. Hey- he is a human being too. :p
Compassion is officially the word of the season. I believe that even in the most evil or plastic of people you meet they do have a heart. I was watching the Grinch on ABC , and laughed out loud at the part when the Grinch realizes he has a heart that can BEAT- and when it does he screams in pain. :p
To have passion means to suffer. Passion comes from the Latin word Passio which means to suffer ... Derive from that what you wish. There is a lot of meaning in that word. To endure... maybe this is why Mel Gibson titled the movie "The Passion of the Christ" this way?
If you are passionate, you are bound to suffer. And if you suffer you will inevitably grow.
So, be human and give. grow. be compassionate and passionate. Who knows the outcome anyway?
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