I have not had a headache this severe in a very long time. I am usually never sick. I take very good care of my health and try to live a balanced life.
This happens when my body goes "off". I'm set off, ticked off, fed up. Its time to completely take care of myself. I have lost myself... and im trying to come back.
I know my worth. I wont try and convince anybody of it. Taking care of ones self is so important. But when you try so hard to take care of those that you love, the balance becomes heavier on one side. Inevitably. Especially for us inherently caring women. Its in our nature.
Take some time to step outside of your own view today. Try and look out for those you love by loving them the way they need. Life is just too short.
xoxo
Showing posts with label being honest. Show all posts
Showing posts with label being honest. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Looking Great
***Attn: Person from Calgary, please step forward and introduce yourself. I see you visit me everyday. ***
This is an attempt to find clarity through writing. Do you ever wonder if its something you ate, or the person you are talking to, or the thoughts in your head -- that keep you from feeling normal? - On any given day?
Today is one of those days. I cant put my finger on it, but something is just not right.
I cant shake it. Hopefully, it wont last. Someone distract me with something concrete to read maybe- put me back in my place in the world? Life is a strange phenomena, and going off of my last post, you- the reader may be able to understand what goes on in my head. This may have something to do with it.
My procrastination is my worst enemy. Its like the big elephant in the room. I need to confront him- and slap him in the face, ordering him to get out.
Ill go for a coffee. Ill take a walk. Ill read a book. Ill continue to write in the face of my unwillingness to focus on one particular "thing"
Peace.
MY
This is an attempt to find clarity through writing. Do you ever wonder if its something you ate, or the person you are talking to, or the thoughts in your head -- that keep you from feeling normal? - On any given day?
Today is one of those days. I cant put my finger on it, but something is just not right.
I cant shake it. Hopefully, it wont last. Someone distract me with something concrete to read maybe- put me back in my place in the world? Life is a strange phenomena, and going off of my last post, you- the reader may be able to understand what goes on in my head. This may have something to do with it.
My procrastination is my worst enemy. Its like the big elephant in the room. I need to confront him- and slap him in the face, ordering him to get out.
Ill go for a coffee. Ill take a walk. Ill read a book. Ill continue to write in the face of my unwillingness to focus on one particular "thing"
Peace.
MY
Friday, February 20, 2009
Crisis of Faith
Currently reading: Palestine Peace not Apartheid. Jimmy Carter.
The End of Faith. Sam Harris
Letters to A Christian Nation. Sam Harris
A Million Little Pieces. James Frey
Currently Thinking: Music at starbucks giving me a headache.
Annoyed with stupid people. There is just no excuse.
Need a job Need a job Need a job Need a job
I love my friends. The real ones.
Here is something I wrote.
Life is a big mystery. Been feeling inspired lately and cant shake the questions. - If there were no life or existance, What is there? What is the point of it all? to serve God? If so- What does God Want? To be a good person to yourself and to others? ...Then why is it that not everyone can follow the same rules of a dogmatic religion? Its impossible. We are all created with individual characteristics, heritage, genes, and circumstances. How is it that we are all supposed to follow one formula? It doesnt make logical sense. I was brought up to always think there are rules and guidelines as to how to be a successful person on this journey called life. I was always told how I was to function in order to secure success. I always struggled with trying to make myself believe... But Belieiveing is also, Hard to believe.
Where does ones beliefs derive? From whcih ever they do. are they universal? -- regardless of whatever is worldly attached to that person?
I want to go with the easy answer to what I have always known. To learn about the techings of the prophets in Islam, and to just read the Quran. So my heart can find rest. Yet- there are so many questions.
At some point, one must choose to believe in something- but if that belief doesnt adhere to a specific religion , does that mean that person is doomed to hell? God cannot be a cruel creator, we are his creations, yet we have the choice. The "free will" etc......We are not the ultimate judges, I suppose.
It is a persons choice to look outside themselves and find whatever it is they are looking for. We cannot be force fed a prescription medication. A one way ticket.
Diversity is what makes us human. Its what makes culture. We ALL have a story to tell. Without that story, life would be fruitless/hum drum.
Without all the things that human beings latch onto to give us an identity we are no body. Its like the movie about the boy who goes into the wild and leaves all his belongings and family behind him. In the end he found that Happiness is not real unless it is shared.
Those things are important. And the balance of the material, physical, metaphysical etc. is essential to our discovery about the journey that we are all destined to take., to live.
To say that worldly things are meaningless is ignorant. It is a cop out for the immature person who wants to take the easy way out. – Whichever way it would suit him or her. Those things would not exist if they were not important for our growth. Everything has a purpose? A reason?
The human capacity to THINK, FEEL, ACT, CREATE, AND TRANSFORM is immense. We are all given that ability. The proof lies with in a physical cat scan of our brain. And- we only really use a small part of it.
Sit on it.
Chao for now
The End of Faith. Sam Harris
Letters to A Christian Nation. Sam Harris
A Million Little Pieces. James Frey
Currently Thinking: Music at starbucks giving me a headache.
Annoyed with stupid people. There is just no excuse.
Need a job Need a job Need a job Need a job
I love my friends. The real ones.
Here is something I wrote.
Life is a big mystery. Been feeling inspired lately and cant shake the questions. - If there were no life or existance, What is there? What is the point of it all? to serve God? If so- What does God Want? To be a good person to yourself and to others? ...Then why is it that not everyone can follow the same rules of a dogmatic religion? Its impossible. We are all created with individual characteristics, heritage, genes, and circumstances. How is it that we are all supposed to follow one formula? It doesnt make logical sense. I was brought up to always think there are rules and guidelines as to how to be a successful person on this journey called life. I was always told how I was to function in order to secure success. I always struggled with trying to make myself believe... But Belieiveing is also, Hard to believe.
Where does ones beliefs derive? From whcih ever they do. are they universal? -- regardless of whatever is worldly attached to that person?
I want to go with the easy answer to what I have always known. To learn about the techings of the prophets in Islam, and to just read the Quran. So my heart can find rest. Yet- there are so many questions.
At some point, one must choose to believe in something- but if that belief doesnt adhere to a specific religion , does that mean that person is doomed to hell? God cannot be a cruel creator, we are his creations, yet we have the choice. The "free will" etc......We are not the ultimate judges, I suppose.
It is a persons choice to look outside themselves and find whatever it is they are looking for. We cannot be force fed a prescription medication. A one way ticket.
Diversity is what makes us human. Its what makes culture. We ALL have a story to tell. Without that story, life would be fruitless/hum drum.
Without all the things that human beings latch onto to give us an identity we are no body. Its like the movie about the boy who goes into the wild and leaves all his belongings and family behind him. In the end he found that Happiness is not real unless it is shared.
Those things are important. And the balance of the material, physical, metaphysical etc. is essential to our discovery about the journey that we are all destined to take., to live.
To say that worldly things are meaningless is ignorant. It is a cop out for the immature person who wants to take the easy way out. – Whichever way it would suit him or her. Those things would not exist if they were not important for our growth. Everything has a purpose? A reason?
The human capacity to THINK, FEEL, ACT, CREATE, AND TRANSFORM is immense. We are all given that ability. The proof lies with in a physical cat scan of our brain. And- we only really use a small part of it.
Sit on it.
Chao for now
Friday, January 30, 2009
Over than Long Due
I sincerely dont know why the blog dry spell has continued for this long. I spend a lot of time reading all of your blogs, but I fail to contribute to my own . Is it my lack of motivation? Is it that I have so many ideas that I simply cannot pick/ focus on one? Whatever the reason. It must never happen again.
I do know that I have been preoccupied and also trying to redefine the purpose of my blog. I read a quote today about writing that was along the lines of- no one wants to read your diary, except your mother. I can easily write about my daily happenings. I can tell you what I do in a day. What I think. But I refuse. I somehow believe that when I write- it must mean something to me. I cannot ramble. I will bore myself because I know I have more important things to write about. Maybe I am afraid to take that risk.
I once found myself a very angry person when I started writing my shitty first draft for an essay I am trying to compose. You write your first draft without thinking, or editing. You lay it all out there with no censorship. How often do you do that in your writing. Write a shitty first draft about anything on your mind- you would be surprised to see what comes out. Send it to me. I would love to read it. Then I dare you to post it on your blog. If you do this, I will also post my shitty drafts. You will be surprised at what you have to say.
In the past few weeks, I have received two blogging awards. The Lemonade award and the Honest Scrap award.
Thank you Antonella (from the stupidest corner of my mind for the Lemonade award! She claims that I write with attitude, and I say that she writes with emotion. And thanks to Rosemarie from Just Moi .
Here are the rules. For the Lemonade, I must nominate ten blogs which I think show attitude/gratitude. But, I never follow the rules- so here are my top five.
They are:
Goslings Aerie
The Day to Day
Attaining the Unattainable
Just Moi
The Shared Journey
Of course, there are even rules in the blogging world. For this award they are:
1) Choose a minimum of 7 blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.
2) Show the 7 winners names and links on your blog, and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with "Honest Scrap."
3) List at least 10 honest things about yourself.
Here goes my ten:
1. If I could have a special talent, I wish I could sing. Sometimes I pretend that I can :P
2. I often get too excited about the cuteness, and cuddle-ability of my kitten that I want to squeeze him until he meows.
3. I check my email at least 20 times a day.
4. I miss being around people that can identify with my heritage/culture.. etc.
5. With the horrible economy and no job, I am wondering if I made a mistake by coming back to the US, when I had a "perfectly good job" in Oman. And when I say perfectly good, it only means that it was paying me money.
6. Sometimes I hesitate to write in fear that the flood gates in my head will spill more than they had intended.
7. I ran into some old friends at the coffee shop today and I was really annoyed to have to make small chat with them. Their lives seems so frivolous in comparison with the things that I am trying to accomplish.
8. I just wrote something really honest, and then erased it. I just broke a rule of the honest scrap award. You can take it back now :p I must always break a rule, don't I?
9. I cannot cook
10. I wish I could have one more day with my mother...
And the honest award goes to:
Attaining Me at Attaining the Unattainable Without going into specific detail of the particulars of a story or an event,This blog describes emotions and moments in life so artistically, and dead on. To the times when you think there is no way to describe that gut feeling, this writer has made the attempt- and succeeded.
The Lil Bee The vibe I get from this blog is nothing but happy. Its terribly cutsey, and I'm all about it.
Biscuit in a Basket I just love the title. Respects are due!
Crystal at Chances are im going to hell for this - Muslim, Jewish It doesn't matter :) Also love the title!
Mars at The Inner Workings of a Media Junkie. Her name is my nickname. She lives in the Arab world - and works there, just as I have. Her experiences I identify with. Media Junkie title more than caught my attention. Much in common!
Okay, I have had enough honesty for one night. I will soon find more in this infinite web of confessions, and all of your lives exposed ... I will find you :)
Maybe Ill get there soon too. Apparently, I am already making the right steps in that direction.
For tomorrow- more motivation. Inspiration in the lovely weather to be expected. In the progress I promise to create.
Love Love,
MY
I do know that I have been preoccupied and also trying to redefine the purpose of my blog. I read a quote today about writing that was along the lines of- no one wants to read your diary, except your mother. I can easily write about my daily happenings. I can tell you what I do in a day. What I think. But I refuse. I somehow believe that when I write- it must mean something to me. I cannot ramble. I will bore myself because I know I have more important things to write about. Maybe I am afraid to take that risk.
I once found myself a very angry person when I started writing my shitty first draft for an essay I am trying to compose. You write your first draft without thinking, or editing. You lay it all out there with no censorship. How often do you do that in your writing. Write a shitty first draft about anything on your mind- you would be surprised to see what comes out. Send it to me. I would love to read it. Then I dare you to post it on your blog. If you do this, I will also post my shitty drafts. You will be surprised at what you have to say.
In the past few weeks, I have received two blogging awards. The Lemonade award and the Honest Scrap award.
Thank you Antonella (from the stupidest corner of my mind for the Lemonade award! She claims that I write with attitude, and I say that she writes with emotion. And thanks to Rosemarie from Just Moi .
Here are the rules. For the Lemonade, I must nominate ten blogs which I think show attitude/gratitude. But, I never follow the rules- so here are my top five.
They are:
Goslings Aerie
The Day to Day
Attaining the Unattainable
Just Moi
The Shared Journey
Of course, there are even rules in the blogging world. For this award they are:
1) Choose a minimum of 7 blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.
2) Show the 7 winners names and links on your blog, and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with "Honest Scrap."
3) List at least 10 honest things about yourself.
Here goes my ten:
1. If I could have a special talent, I wish I could sing. Sometimes I pretend that I can :P
2. I often get too excited about the cuteness, and cuddle-ability of my kitten that I want to squeeze him until he meows.
3. I check my email at least 20 times a day.
4. I miss being around people that can identify with my heritage/culture.. etc.
5. With the horrible economy and no job, I am wondering if I made a mistake by coming back to the US, when I had a "perfectly good job" in Oman. And when I say perfectly good, it only means that it was paying me money.
6. Sometimes I hesitate to write in fear that the flood gates in my head will spill more than they had intended.
7. I ran into some old friends at the coffee shop today and I was really annoyed to have to make small chat with them. Their lives seems so frivolous in comparison with the things that I am trying to accomplish.
8. I just wrote something really honest, and then erased it. I just broke a rule of the honest scrap award. You can take it back now :p I must always break a rule, don't I?
9. I cannot cook
10. I wish I could have one more day with my mother...
And the honest award goes to:
Attaining Me at Attaining the Unattainable Without going into specific detail of the particulars of a story or an event,This blog describes emotions and moments in life so artistically, and dead on. To the times when you think there is no way to describe that gut feeling, this writer has made the attempt- and succeeded.
The Lil Bee The vibe I get from this blog is nothing but happy. Its terribly cutsey, and I'm all about it.
Biscuit in a Basket I just love the title. Respects are due!
Crystal at Chances are im going to hell for this - Muslim, Jewish It doesn't matter :) Also love the title!
Mars at The Inner Workings of a Media Junkie. Her name is my nickname. She lives in the Arab world - and works there, just as I have. Her experiences I identify with. Media Junkie title more than caught my attention. Much in common!
Okay, I have had enough honesty for one night. I will soon find more in this infinite web of confessions, and all of your lives exposed ... I will find you :)
Maybe Ill get there soon too. Apparently, I am already making the right steps in that direction.
For tomorrow- more motivation. Inspiration in the lovely weather to be expected. In the progress I promise to create.
Love Love,
MY
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